It's never been better

a journey

  • About Ellie
  • Home
  • Read The Story
  • Contact Ellie
  • June 24, 2019

    The fuck am I doing with my life?

  • January 5, 2019

    5

    5

    I’m 5 years, 2 months and 2 days post-stroke. (Likely 5 years, 2 months and 3 days, by the time I finish writing this. It’s late.) 5 years. 5. That’s half a decade. Oy. 3 months and 4 days since I last updated this site. Sorry about that; I just wanted to step back for […]

  • September 4, 2018

    Thank you

    Thank you

    The last time I did it to myself, I didn’t realize what I was doing until it was done, but I knew it was coming, and that whatever it was, it was about to happen. Adam noticed it while it was healing, showed me the below image, then ordered and surprised me with a set of non-toxic, skin-safe markers. Now I draw on myself…

  • August 12, 2018

    Harvey

    Last night I remembered how scared, how alone I’d been during hurricane Harvey. Yeah, I’d busied myself with packing donations. That was before I’d realized I couldn’t get out of the apartment building, or that the atmospheric pressure changes had impacted me as they had. I’m embarrassed to have been so affected when others lived […]

  • August 11, 2018

    Journal entry #4

    Tomorrow, I will be cheerful. Tomorrow, I will be positive. Tomorrow, I will have energy. Because today, I just can’t. Today I am hurting. Today, I am not okay. And that is perfectly fine. Just writing that made me smile. See? Already getting there. 🙂

  • June 10, 2018

    Journal entry #8

    This is too on point to not share. I’m very ugly So don’t try to convince me that I am a very beautiful person Because at the end of the day I hate myself in every way And I’m not going to lie to myself by saying There is beauty inside of me that matters […]

  • May 17, 2018

    #LifeIsBeautiful

    We have no control over it, but what we do have control over is whether we can be proud of our own lives. I mean, that’s something we have complete say over – it’s kind of hard to even describe – I think I’m just as confused as everyone else on how to make our lives a piece of art, but I think that’s part of the joy – simply trying. I can stand up here and genuinely tell you that I am genuinely proud of my life…

  • May 14, 2018

    Journal entry #7

    Have you ever been sitting around, doing whatever, and then suddenly and out of nowhere you feel… different, somehow? Sort of like you’ve been locked in your body for several years and you’ve just woken up, even though you’ve been conscious all those years, you’re suddenly… aware. Alive, again. This might seem odd but something […]

  • April 23, 2018

    Journal entry #6 – neuropathy

    Three hours to go before my alarm will shout encouragement at me. I’m exhausted. No matter how exhausted I am, I have to stick with my morning workouts. Hemiparesis and spasticity don’t wait for me to be prepared. They show up, uninvited and unannounced, rudely staying until they decide to leave on a whim. Tiny […]

  • March 21, 2018

    It’s [already] been a long day… But it’ll get better. :)

    I don’t know what triggers me anymore. What’s wrong? Oh, nothing, really. I’m just anxious. Depressed. Broken. Angry. Tired. Bored. Busy. Aphasiac. Worthless. A burden. A hindrance. Frustrated. ‘Lazy’. Working my ass off to simply go check the mail. Tired. Useless. Stressed. Worried. Frustrated. (Yes, let’s list that one again.) I’m in everyone’s way, all […]

←Previous Page
1 2 3 4 5 … 22
Next Page→
About

Privacy Policy

Terms & Conditions

Subscribe

Contact

Work with me

Services

Create a website or blog at WordPress.com

 

Loading Comments...
 

    • Follow Following
      • It's never been better
      • Join 35 other followers
      • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
      • It's never been better
      • Edit Site
      • Follow Following
      • Sign up
      • Log in
      • Report this content
      • View site in Reader
      • Manage subscriptions
      • Collapse this bar