Archives

#LifeIsBeautiful

We have no control over it, but what we do have control over is whether we can be proud of our own lives. I mean, that’s something we have complete say over – it’s kind of hard to even describe – I think I’m just as confused as everyone else on how to make our lives a piece of art, but I think that’s part of the joy – simply trying.

I can stand up here and genuinely tell you that I am genuinely proud of my life…

Advertisements

Read More

Misremembering is better than forgetting

Remembering Grace, again. And again. This year, I thought it would be 9 years within the hour. Nope. It’ll be 9 years in 48 hours and 38 minutes. Memory difficulties suck. She’d be 8 this July. There’s too much to write. I’ll sleep on it. Thinking of you, Gracie. Always am. ❤

Read More

New batteries make my brain go ’round

I squealed after setting my cell phone on the kitchen counter and excitedly bounced on my toes – while holding onto the counter, of course – for a moment, then turned to place my medicine bottles back in the cupboard above my head. It must seen strange, my looking forward to another surgery. Let me […]

Read More

Journal entry #1

I wake rather late, but cheerful nonetheless. I don’t feel entirely cheerful; it’s a chilly, rainy morning and I know that I might get low if I don’t urge myself not to. I wobble into the kitchen. Make tea. Start the monotonous routine I’ve come to know since the “lows” made their appearance known a […]

Read More

-364 days

1 year ago – Monday, May 16 2016 I waited, excited and nervous. Tomorrow. A burr hole will expose the surface of my brain for the very first time… tomorrow. Less than 24 hours. I don’t remember what I did that morning, or the days leading up to it. I know that I watched videos […]

Read More

The Quitter

Just have one more try. It’s dead easy to die, It’s the living on that’s hard. “The Quitter” by Robert Williams Service

Read More

Better Than New 

After my last post, my friend, Elizabeth, wrote this to me: ‘Ellie if you are feeling broken, please remember the Japanese process of Kintsugi. Pottery that is broken is repaired with gold. It highlights that the mended repair is beautiful. It emphasizes  beauty in the imperfect. Perfection  is overrated. Your brain is wonderful just the […]

Read More

Seizures suck.

A very quick recap of yesterday: I began having seizures just before 11am CT yesterday. I don’t remember much and was pretty confused for a while. Anyway, I’m home now and am getting scheduled for tests this week. Jeffrey’s DBS surgery is early tomorrow morning; I’m hoping that I can still go to that.  The […]

Read More

WARNING: Graphic content. DBS surgery videos

I forgot to upload them, but here they are. Enjoy!

Read More