Archives

Quiet

I have come to find that one of the biggest feelings you can feel is that of a hollow, empty, reckless emotion that evades any possible reason or cause. It whips you around at times, completely unexpectedly, striking you from the edges like a car nicking your side and sending you reeling into some utter […]

Read More

Milestone 

Today I brushed my teeth with my stroke-affected, hemiparetic hand.  3 years later and it’s still the little things that make me happy. 

Read More

Remembering Grace, again 

8 years, 1 day, 8 hours ago (February 13, 2009, 01:something AM) I’m days from my 20th birthday and I have something that needs to be said before I lose the nerve to say it again. The way he forced me, then acted like he gave a damn when he found out about my baby […]

Read More

Lower 

I have days when things get bad. When too much sensory input collides with my still-healing and forever-damaged brain. I hate these – those – days. I don’t hate it during them, though; I don’t anything them because I don’t feel anything about anything on those days; it’s peaceful, quiet, to feel nothing other than […]

Read More

When hope is not enough

Action and reaction, cause and effect, dendritic output and neuronal necrosis – what, and to what effect? My body doesn’t obey, though it wants to. It has to want to. I need it to want to.  It doesn’t obey but that doesn’t matter anyway. Because I wasn’t born with it and didn’t inherit it, so […]

Read More

Well, that was sort of an earthquake…

It was a little before 11 in the morning and I’d already up hours. I flopped down onto the couch after my final set of squats. Pulling out my phone, I scrolled through my Facebook feed for a few minutes after finishing my morning workout. Time to catch a breather before eating my second meal […]

Read More

Seizures suck.

A very quick recap of yesterday: I began having seizures just before 11am CT yesterday. I don’t remember much and was pretty confused for a while. Anyway, I’m home now and am getting scheduled for tests this week. Jeffrey’s DBS surgery is early tomorrow morning; I’m hoping that I can still go to that.  The […]

Read More

Vertigo cont. plus an AFO!

“May I have your date of birth and is the member ID number on the back of your insurance card?” I wanted to cry. My prescription was going to be filled and, soon, the world would stop spinning and I’d be able to close my eyes without feeling this feeling. Vertigo sucks. I read my […]

Read More

Is this really worth it? Yeah. It is. 

Real friends – people are worth it. ‘People are precious, and sometimes we forget that. …they need friends, they need love. …love everybody, even the little and dumb and fat and ugly and weird, and, well, if we all lived like that, then maybe terrible things like we’ve just seen wouldn’t happen… and I guess that’s it.’

Read More